Opposites Attract . . . Just Not Organizationally

The phrase "opposites attract" may be true for some romantic relationships, but once that honeymoon period is over, being opposites in organizational styles can be an everyday challenge.  One person may feel frustrated at the piles that accumulate on counters and tables while the other becomes frustrated that the piles keep getting cleaned up.  So, how do individuals that share a space, but not the same organizational styles, live together peacefully?

Just as in any relationship--communicating expectations, recognizing each other's preferences / priorities and learning to compromise can go a long way to promoting organizational harmony at home.  Taking the time to have a frank discussion can help eliminate future disagreements.

Beginning with communicating expectations, having each person describe what they hope for in home organization and maintaining that order is key to understanding organizational differences.  As Russian novelist, Fyodor Dostoyevsky once said, “Much unhappiness has come into the world because of bewilderment and things left unsaid.”  A significant other may have no idea that the person they are living with does not care whether the mail is sorted every day or that the house is picked up each evening.  He or she will be silently sulking if they fail to communicate this expectation to their less organized significant other.

  

Recognizing each individual’s preferences for cleanliness and order can also help define where each person devotes their time and energy in the home.  One individual may find it easy to keep the counters clutter free.  At the same time, the person who stacks piles upon the counters may be very dedicated to keeping an orderly lawn and a well-organized garden.  Most couples can identify what is important to them and then take on that responsibility.

When it becomes difficult to agree on the level of organization in common spaces, compromise can be a powerful tool.  Going back to the example where one person prefers sorting the mail daily and the other person can care less if the mail accumulates on the counter for two weeks, proposing a workable compromise can help meet both individual’s preferences.  The person who prefers sorting the mail daily could propose to sort his or her mail only.  That person could then offer to set up an inbox that is not located on the counter for the other person, who can then sort their mail at their leisure.  This type of compromise can work for larger spaces too.  The person who is not as tidy and organized may propose having a room that is “theirs” only.  This room does not have to meet the organizational expectations of the other.  However, in exchange for this space, the less organized individual may agree to help keep the remainder of the home up to the organizational standards of their partner. 

Whether your relationship is new—or you and your partner have been battling this issue for years, taking the time to talk about something as simple as how each of you prefer to organized your spaces is a fantastic way to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Organizing in Small Spaces

Organizing itself can be a challenge, but organizing a small space can be even more difficult.  It is the equivalent of taking a three week family vacation in the wood-paneled station wagon packed with everyone's bags versus taking that same vacation in a deluxe RV.  It is difficult to live in a space when your necessary items take over your living space!  

Let's start with the idea of "necessary" items in a home.  Most people could easily live without many of the items they "need" in their home.  

Yes, the first step to organizing a small space is to evaluate what is stored in that space.  If evaluating items seems like a unnecessary step, consider that clutter is expensive.  It costs an average of $10 per square foot to store items in your house.  Put in monetary terms, a person can really calculate the cost of hanging onto that fondue pot they might use someday.

Evaluating items begins with sorting items into the following piles - keep, donate, sell, toss, relocate.  If it is difficult to evaluate whether an item should stay in your space, using the following questions can help:

• When was the last time I used this?  (if it’s been more than a year, let it go)
• How often do I use it? 
• Could I borrow, rent, or improvise with something the few times I might need it? 
• Is it a duplicate?
• Is it out of date?
•  If I didn’t have this anymore, what impact would it have on my life? 
• Do I value this item? 
• Is this item in need of repair or damaged? 
• Am I keeping it because I feel guilty if I tossed it or gave it away?
• How easily could I get another one if I needed it?

Storage for pantry items that do not fit in the pantry
(photo credit:  marthastewart,com)

After surveying the "keep" pile and the space available for the items, an individual can decide if the items will fit or not.  If items do not fit, consider a "second sort" or come up with some creative storage ideas.  Use the guideline of "Frequency of Use," to determine where items will be stored.  Items used daily are placed within close reach.  Items used less frequently can be stored in a more distant, but still accessible location.

For example, if the keep pile for the pantry is larger than the pantry space itself, a person can install shelving along a basement stairwell for items used less frequently.

If the space is still storage challenged (i.e. little or no closets, cabinets, floor space for an armoire, shelving), then it is time to think outside the box . . . or rather, along the walls of the "box."  

Using vertical space from the floor to the ceiling is one way to solve storage problems.  Some of the more clever ideas include:  


    (photo credits:  marthastewart.com)

• Installing a peg board on the closet wall
• Use magnetic paint or galvanized panels to magnetically hang items (this is especially handy with small bath or kitchen items).
• Stack two or three towel bars behind a closed bathroom door
• Install a toiletry shelf in bathroom above the door

And one the better ideas to conquer the little to no closet dilemma--the "Walk-By Closet."  This solution is both smart and beautiful.  Use an older ladder to bridge between two basic shelving units, and a person has designed a unique and practical clothing storage solution.  Place a bench underneath and you create a place to put on shoes as well as store them underneath.

(photo credit:  marthastewart.com)

And speaking of underneath, don't forget that little used space underneath beds .  Evict the dust bunnies and replace them with underneath storage such as a couple of old dresser drawers placed on casters.  

(photo credit:  bhg.com)

With these and other “outside the box” ideas, a small space (that wood paneled station wagon) can start to feel a lot roomier.  With a little effort and imagination, who wouldn’t want to create a more enjoyable space for everyone?

Kids and Organization--Do These Words Even Belong in the Same Sentence?

Teaching kids to be organized is a recipe that includes consistently setting a good example,  good planning and a little psychology.  Sound like a lot of work?  Maybe--but just as with any new habit, after sticking with it for a time period, a new behavior takes root.  And, according to University College London's Health Behavior Research Centre,  that new behavior becomes automatic and "does not rely on conscious thought, memory or willpower."  It is worth a little effort early on, knowing that the payoff will be worth it (kids will pick up themselves without help and they will be able to miraculously be able to find things they are looking for).

Are you setting the example?
(photo credit:  ahomemakerintraining@blogspot.com)

Back to the recipe--consistently setting a good example means that if a parent would like their children to make their beds everyday and clean up their toys at the end of the day, the parent should try to model that behavior.  This certainly is not a genius or original idea.  But the parent honestly evaluating if they are setting a good example might be new for some people.  Parents can ask themselves, "Did I pick up my clothes off the floor?  Did I put my dishes in the dishwasher?  Is my room a disaster?"  And if the parent really wants an honest answer, ask the kids!

Once kids understand that they will be held to the same standards as the "grown-ups," the next step to getting kids organized is good planning.  Like most people, kids like boundaries--knowing where things are and what to expect throughout the day.  The old saying, "A place for everything and everything in its place" perfectly describes how a person can help children get and stay organized.  The parent can take some time to designate a specific place for things in the child's room or toy area.  For example, it's much easier to follow specific instructions such as, "Put all the cars into the bin labeled 'Cars,'" than it is to follow the order, "Clean up your room."   In other words, the parent can help children be successful in staying organized if they can provide the basic framework for the organization.

Additionally, planning time into everyday to clean up helps everyone to keep on top of the chaos that comes with kids.  Tackling small messes daily is so much easier and less overwhelming than dealing with a mountain of things at the end of the week. 

Turn Chores Into a Fun Game!
(Photo credit:  buzzfeed.com)

Finally, the last principle for getting kids organized requires the parent to understand a little psychology.  If the parent knows:

1.  Kids love attention and being involved

2.  Kids can be motivated with certain incentives

3.  Kids like fun and games

If a parent takes the time to include their kids in the clean-up routine, develop some sort of meaningful reward for when the children do a good job staying organized and make it part of a fun game—they are successfully employing persuasive techniques to instill good organizational habits.  For example, a parent could challenge their child to an Organizational Olympics where they both strive to put the most toys away in a three minute time period.  The winner of the Organizational Olympics gets to choose a special reward such as deciding the dinner menu, picking out a movie to watch or getting some extra book time at night.  In this example, the parent took what could be a dreaded chore and turned it into a fun game where the child walks away feeling loved and included.  The rewards and games motivate the child to want to repeat the behavior again. 

And there is nothing like a child feeling the personal satisfaction of a job well done.  As one seven and a half year old recently said after cleaning up her room, “It feels so much better, it feels like I can breathe!”

Transitioning Homes . . . More Than Just Packing and Unpacking Boxes

Moving often conjures images of endless boxes, moving trucks and hours of packing and unpacking.  Most people only think of the physical work involved in a move--but there is quite a bit of mental and emotional work that comes with transitioning to a new home.  Regardless of whether the move is across town or across the country--or whether the move is to a larger or smaller space--people can make the entire process go more smoothly if they acknowledge and address the mental and emotional work that comes with transition.

What is the mental or emotional work of moving?  It is more than using a moving checklist or saying goodbye to friends and neighbors.  It is process of disassembling a person's "safe and familiar" place and reassembling it in a completely new space.  It can mean facing the fear of the unknown and the uncertainty of something new.  And it can involve countless decisions about what items get moved, passed on, donated, fixed, or thrown out.  For example, a individual may wonder, "Will the new house be as comfortable as my last house?  Will I love how everything looks once the boxes are unpacked?  Will everything fit? What do I do with the things that don't fit?  What do I do with the empty spaces once everything I own is moved in?"

Whether the transition is an upgrade to a larger home or downsizing to a smaller space--there are some simple organizational steps to help with the mental and emotional work of the move.  As with any big change in life, it helps to have support, find out answers to the "unknowns," and think in terms of opportunities versus difficulties.  

Starting with "thinking in terms of opportunities," moving provides a person with one of the best chances to evaluate all of their belongings and make the conscious decision to declutter and simplify.  Moving forces a person to ask themselves, "Why have I been saving Uncle Fred's collection of velvet Elvis paintings?"  There are five simple questions to help with these sorts of difficult decisions:

1. Have I or anyone else in the house used this item within the past year?
2. Do I see a use for this item in the near future?  (i.e. Would it be difficult or expensive to replace the item?)
3. Is it more important to keep the item than to have the space it occupies? (i.e. Is it a family treasure?)
4. Does the item serve a worthwhile purpose in my life?
5. Do I love it?

There are no right or wrong answers to these questions.  A “yes” to any of them provides a good reason to keep the item.  A “no” indicates the item also has a new home in its future.

Once a person sees moving as an opportunity, it becomes exciting to plan their new "safe and familiar" place.  One way to replace the fear of the unknown with the excitement of something new is to get a copy of the floorplan and brainstorm!  Cutting out furniture icons or drawing them onto the floorplan with a template and pencil is a great way to bridge the transition from the old to the new home.  It also is a tremendous help in the decluttering and simplifying process just described.  A person can then "see" how the new home will look.  An added bonus?  Saving time and money on not moving items that do not fit into a person's life or space.

Velvet Elvii
Photo Credit:  blogs.smithsonianmag.com

Finally, it always helps to have support.  If that basement gallery of velvet Elvis paintings gives a person hives, he or she can always call in a friend or family member to assist with the sorting process.  That friend or family member can help design the new and improved velvet Elvis gallery or he or she can gently break the news that “Elvis needs to leave the building.”

    

Action Central - Implementing a System That Works

I came to the realization the other day that the “hub” of our home—the place where most of our family’s organizational information and schedules (including my office)—is located in an unusual place, our pantry.  Yes, there is food in there too, along with the crock pot, lobster pot and various other kitchen items—but I would venture to guess that one third of the space is dedicated to our organization system.

Action Central

Included in this system are school calendars, lunch menus, work schedules, appointment notices, important business cards, the recycling guidelines, babysitter’s phone numbers, gift certificates, emergency contacts and and a few other worthy pieces of information (the rules of tennis and a quote by Mother Theresa labeled “Anyway”).  And the food--don’t forget the original purpose of a pantry, food storage.

Why does this system work?  And what makes any organizational system work?  Here are a few guidelines to follow when establishing a home organizational system:

1.  Consolidation -- All important information is consolidated in one location.

When running a household, being efficient saves time, money and frustration.  A person should consider their hub their home’s “Inbox.”  This Inbox should collect all the “stuff” that comes into a person’s daily life.  Items to go into the Inbox include "To Do" lists, calendars, schedules, phone messages, business cards, mail to sort, and items to read and review.  It is then up to the individual how they plan to sort, categorize and act on the information in their Inbox.

2.  Relevant Items -- All related materials, supplies and equipment are positioned in the same location.

These are the items that make a person’s system flow:  pens, paper, telephone, cell chargers, trash can, file folders, filing container, bulletin boards, magnetic boards, etc.

3.  Accessibility -- The location is one that is accessible to all using the system. 

If this is a whole family system, all members must be able to use it.  A person could include a step ladder for children.  Or a magnetic dry erase board might be easier for all versus using a traditional cork board with push pins.

4.  Location, location, location -- The system is situated in a high traffic zone.

If a person can walk by and see their system several times a day, he or she can stay on top of the appointments, To Do lists and other various things that come through the Inbox.  This is key to avoid feeling overwhelmed.  One of the biggest obstacles to getting organized is when a person feels that he or she has to dedicate large amounts of time to an enormous project.  Staying on top of the Inbox eliminates this stress.

No Need to Close This Behind a Door
photo credit:  apartmenttherapy.com

Some Day
photo credit:  365ishpins.blogspot.com

 Back to the “hub” in my pantry . . . it works because I know that the room that holds the food is the most popular place in our house (accessible to all and in a high traffic zone).  It also contains almost all of the “Inbox” items (calendars, schedules, lunch menu and appointment cards) and the necessary related items—pens, trash can, lunch boxes, and FOOD.  And, as I look at the picture, I realize our organization system may not look as pretty as the pictures in a home design magazine—but it’s extremely functional, and more importantly, I can always close the door.

The Emotional Connection to Disorganization and Letting Clutter Go

Imagine walking into your bedroom at the end of the day, exhausted and ready for sleep, only to discover the bed unmade and five loads of laundry on top of that.  Take a second to think about how you feel when you survey the mountain of clothing and sheets that are keeping you from a peaceful and much needed rest? 

photo credit:  www.kayladanelle.com

Now imagine how you would feel walking into your bedroom and seeing the bed nicely made, maybe even the sheets turned down (chocolate on the pillow?), ready for you to climb into and get a good night’s sleep. 

Expanding on this example, the clutter that people collect in their surroundings is equivalent to that mountain of clothing and sheets.  That mountain is the “stuff” in a person’s space—and until it is removed, a person is kept from a peaceful and restful existence. 

Having “stuff” everywhere is over stimulating for the human brain.  People have a stress reaction to clutter, just as you might have when you imagined the “mountain” on the bed.  Clearing out the “stuff” allows a person to be able to handle more. 

Decluttering is more than removing unnecessary items from your space—it encompasses psychological and emotional components that people often overlook, downplay or don’t even acknowledge exist.  Clutter takes up both physical and mental space.  It gets in the way of individuals moving forward--being free to explore the opportunities that open up when they allow the space for them.  Being open to that opportunity and uncertainty can be scary, yet it can also be exciting, thrilling and life changing.

There are lists of reasons why people accumulate stuff—they inherit it and can’t bear to let it go, they keep things “just in case” they need it one day, they buy to impress others or buy as a form of “retail therapy”—the list goes on.  And just as there is an emotional component to why people accumulate, there are emotional reasons to why people can’t unclutter. 

Photo credit:  www.sunshinehospitality.blogspot.com

The things people have in their lives remind them of loved ones who have passed away, of happier times, of children when they were young.  Yet, saying goodbye to those items does not mean a person is saying goodbye to those loved ones or happier days.  It is not permanently closing a door—the memories will remain with a person, even if the stuff does not.  

Stuff is also part of a person’s identity—the clothes they wear, the car they drive, the way their home is furnished.  As people’s lives change, so do their identities.  It may be difficult coming to terms with these changes and accept who they are today.  Letting go of old stuff may be equivalent to letting go of who they used to be.   

By exploring these emotional barriers, individuals may find it easier to simplify and let go of the things that encumber their surroundings.  And when a person lets go of something they don’t need or have space for anymore, they make room for something new and wonderful in their life (like a chocolate on their pillow at night).

Starting Small - The Junk Drawer in the Kitchen

We all have them--the kitchen junk drawer.  And as much as we despise storing all those odds and ends, they serve a necessary function.  Where else can you find twist ties, batteries, chapstick, grocery coupons, rubber bands, calculators, pens, tools, and notepads all in the same place?  But if all those functional items are all jumbled together, the drawer and its contents lose its usefulness.  

Using a simple example like the kitchen junk drawer, I thought I would outline the organization process so others can apply it to projects both big and small.  And, to be fair, the first thing I did is walk over to my junk drawer.

My first thought was that it wasn't bad at all.  I had items grouped together in tidy Bamboo Drawer Organizer Boxes--and my grocery list was right there so I could add things easily.  Yes, that crazy spreadsheet is actually a grocery list--and I plan to explain it in another post very soon.

Opening up another junk drawer in my kitchen, I found something I could work with.  This is the drawer that holds all those essential kitchen items, most of which are awkward and odd shaped.  As you can see from the picture, finding a wine bottle opener wasn't a problem.  The problem was that I had 4 and each were in a different location in the drawer.  

Before

Let’s walk through the organization process:

1.  Set a Goal - An organized kitchen “junk” drawer

2.    Prioritize and Pick – Looking at two different drawers, it was obvious one needed more attention than the other.

3.    Set Up – Locate a small trash bag and a sponge for wiping the drawer organizer clean

4.    Start with a Clean Slate – Empty out the entire drawer and clean it

5.    Sort – Everything goes into one of the following piles:

• Relocate – move items that do not belong in the drawer (that meant those orange pumpkin carving knives needed a new home)
• Keep – items to be placed back in the drawer (things used most like the pizza cutter, can opener, kitchen shears)
• Fix – any broken items
• Toss – throw away anything that is unsalvageable (an old knife sharpener that no longer sharpened)
• Donate – give away items that someone else can use (I had 5 bottle openers and 3 wine openers that I could pass on to a needy bar and grill)
• Sell – items in order to recoup some of the original cost

After

6.    Group Like Items – From the keep pile, I grouped together the ice cream scoops, the scissors with the scissors, etc. until all items were placed with similar items.

7.    Organize – This is the step where you place your "keep" items back into the space.  What is important here is that everything you keep is something you like and use on a regular basis; and it has a “home.”  In this example, the “home” is a Bamboo Expandable Utility Drawer Organizer with separate compartments.  Without this insert, this drawer would quickly become a mess again.

This is where your project can get creative.  Sure, you can go out and get a fancy organizer, but you can also use whatever you have around the house or items you find at local thrift or consignment shops.  Consider using one of the following:

• Tupperware containers
• Glass or plastic baby food jars]
• Check boxes or cereal boxes covered in heavy paper or cloth
• Thrift or consignment store finds (mixed patterns of china or glass bowls or mismatched containers)

8.  Evaluate – Step back and look at your finished project—did you meet your goal?  In this example, yes, my kitchen utensil junk drawer is much less crowded and only contains the items I really use regularly (no I don’t carve pumpkins every week).

You can use these steps whether your project is one kitchen drawer or the whole kitchen.  Best of luck with your projects, whether big or small and may all your junk drawers be organized!